Chronicles of a Black Lolita, Pt. 3: Five Cons to Being A Black Lolita **CW: Racial Slurs**

I hope y'all are ready for a long ass ride (NCTzens, where y'all at?!) because this post is going to be a doozy.

Grab some tea, buckle your seatbelt, and hear me out.

I do not own!

Being a Black Lolita isn't something I feel bad or sad about. Despite the tone of this post, I don't have a chip on my shoulder in regards to how I'm treated in this fashion because it's not new to me. Most PoC (People of Color, for those unaware) have to deal with nonsense on some level, and a lot of us have been dealing with it our entire lives. Lolita is not an exception.

Still, I love being a Lolita. I won't stop for anyone, let alone people that hate me for something out of my control. I *also* love being Black. These two sentiments aren't mutually exclusive either, but because of these two labels I wear, I run into issues.

Lolitas, in general, are a resilient bunch. We have to deal with people accusing us of escapism, fetishism, pedophilia, and all types of awful things. We get catcalls from random strangers on the street, people confusing us for cosplayers, and other misunderstandings, all across the globe. In that subject, every Lolita understands what it's like to be persecuted for who you are and what you enjoy.

But what non-Black Lolitas may not experience, or understand, is the degree to which this persecution occurs. In nearly every aspect of our entire experience as Black Lolitas, our race comes into the equation. It's also one of the reasons why it frustrates me so much when people say things such as "Why do you have to bring race into this?" or "Why are you trying to make Lolita political?".

Facts are, like it or not, our race always comes into play. Our identity as Black Lolitas will always be something we have to think of, constantly. Just when we get comfortable enough to think "Maybe it's not such a big deal anymore" something happens to remind us that it *is*.

One thing to remember is that these problems come from a global society that, at its heart, is anti-Black. The idea that white skin is good, and dark skin is bad, is a symptom of believing that darkness is somehow an inherently negative thing. Still, these issues need to be addressed, and uncovered.

The five cons I want to highlight are in no particular order, and mostly are just based on the flow of my own thoughts. I'll be providing lots of external sources in this post too, so if you have some time, take a look through those links as well.

1. Lack of Resources

Google Search Results.

Do me a favor: go to your search bar, and type the words "Lolita fashion" into the box. Now, click on the Images tab, and count how many dark skinned people you see in those pictures. In my search, I found 1 person after scrolling through the first four rows of photos.

Now, let's try that search again, but this time with the term "Black Lolita":

Second Google Search.

All right, this time we got: a banner of the BLC, two Youtube videos and.... unrelated stuff that has nothing to do with Black people in Lolita fashion.

With these extremely simple, vague Google searches, I could only find 2 sources of information that are specifically geared towards Black Lolitas, and both of them are Youtube channels. That's not to downplay the power of Youtube, but to say that out of millions of Youtube videos, thousands of Tumblr posts, hundreds of blogs, and FB content, Google could only find THREE sources for me, and it didn't even fully direct me to the Black Lolita Community; it showed me the old banner for the group page.

Black Lolitas have little to no resources we can use to help us in Lolita because they simply don't exist. Other than the various Black-centric groups on FB, there's no such thing as a Black Lolita Bible or Black Lolita Tips.

Instead, we have to hope that places like Lolita Tips or The Lolita Guide Book mention Black Lolitas. They both do, (thankfully), but if they didn't, what would we have? 

I'm sure the first retort I'll hear for this section is: "Well, why don't you create your own?!" and I assure you, there are several people out there already in the process of "making our own". My blog is one of those resources. The Black Lolita Community also serves as one of those resources.

However, in making our own resources, I want everyone to understand that the idea of making "separate, but equal" places for Black and brown people doesn't solve the root of the problem. If history tells us anything, that actually tends to make it worse.

Separate, but equal water fountains in the US, in the 1950s.

Don't believe me? A great, real life example of that (besides the entire Segregation Era in the US) is the scandal of Gothic Lolita Wigs from 2015.

In Feb. 2015, the US-based brand Gothic Lolita Wigs (aka Rockstar wigs, aka Dolluxe aka Cosplay Wigs USA) received a comment on their FB page from a well-intentioned customer asking why they didn't feature more tan or dark-skinned models on their page.

Photo Credit: Otomeiro-disco

The brand replied that all though they do use tan and dark-skinned models, they are often photoshopped to give them "a more doll-like appearance that is part of our company image." We'll talk more on why that act is hella problematic as it is, but for now, let's follow the story.

Another member of the GLW team chimed in on a different post, further taking their foot and shoving it in their mouth. This time the GLW rep went so far as to say "Black women(s) will never buy a wig if they see it on a cute girl with frilly clothes" which is why Gothic Lolita Wigs created 4 other websites to market their wigs to various target demographics. 

Photo Credit: Otomeiro-disco

So with 5 "separate, but equal websites" everyone can finally be featured, right? 

Wrong; all the websites featured the exact same demographic as the site before it: pale skinned, White-passing, White, or Asian people with a sprinkle of darker skinned models who were photoshopped to the point of no longer being dark.

This is just one of the many comparison photos that were made when this entire issue came to light.

For more comparison pictures, take a look at Otomeiro-disco's post.

Example of GLW white-washing on a tan model,
Photo Credit: Otomeiro-disco

One of the only dark skinned models who weren't photoshopped beyond recognition by GLW was drag queen Coco Montrese, who was asked to model the most tone deaf wig of all time: the Jezebel wig.

RockStar Wigs "Jezebel" wig.

For more information on the history of the term "jezebel" in regards to Black people, and a better breakdown of the implications of THIS issue, check out Heir of Glee's post. 

"Separate, but equal" is usually never equal, and is merely putting a band-aid on a bullet wound. All of this could have been solved by simply hiring more Black/dark-skinned models, and leaving their skin tones alone, but instead GLW tried to outmaneuver everyone, and yet, they still failed.

As a result, there was an uproar within the Black Lolita community, and calls to boycott Gothic Lolita Wigs, and all its subsidiaries, could be heard from the J-Fashion community as a whole. 

However, in 2019, there are STILL Lolitas that purchase wigs from this company, even with knowledge of the situation. The lack of solidarity and support by non-Black Lolitas when these types of issues occur is disheartening, for sure.

2. Little to No Solidarity/Support 

PM from a Black Lolita about her experience within the fashion.

I've heard so many stories like the one above, and every single time, it breaks my heart. The ice on the crap cake is that after Black Lolitas have these experiences, more often than not, we're left to stand-alone and fend for ourselves when -ish hits the proverbial fan.

Here's another example: Last week, a member of the FB group, Rufflechat, thought a thread about cultural approriation would be a great place to ask Black Lolitas if it was ok to use a racial slur.

Rufflechat thread, -_- 

As of writing this post, Jian Ma, the person who used a racial slur in a group of over 8,800 members is *still* a member of Rufflechat. They have not been banned or suspended for using the word, even though the Group Rules specifically state "no personal attacks, no trolling, and no posts that aren't safe for work."

So then, are the mods of RC saying it's okay for people to use racial slurs on the page? Even in the context of asking a question (which, come on, we all know this isn't an "innocent question" to ask EVER), it's still using a slur, and also breaking at least two or three of the group rules. 

That person's continued presence in the group shows exactly how seriously Rufflechat take racial slurs. "Innocent Question" or not, that person used a racial slur, and they still have access to the page with no consequences for their actions, except a deleted thread, and maybe a warning.

It is contradictory to say you're against racist behavior while simultaneously condoning and funding the companies and people that continue to behave in this manner. It is harmful to be silent while your fellow Lolitas have to endure such hateful situations, that come about for no reason other than their skin color.

3. Racism/Colorism

Testimony from a Black Lolita.

When Black Lolitas experience racism and colorism, it isn't just from the "normal" people that don't understand why we're dressed like "Little Bo Peep". It's from people within the Lolita community that seriously have no idea just how hurtful they are. Or maybe they know, and they don't care -- there's no telling sometimes.

The same person that shared this first message with me also had the unfortunate "pleasure" of having a meme made of her, comparing her appearance to Jabba the Hutt.

Racist meme made about a plus sized, Black Lolita.

Let's also not forget the entire racist rant from Rotting Doll in Dec. 2018, where Black Lolitas were accused of "reverse racist" by pointing out that they want to see more dark skinned people in J-Fashion.

Missed out on that scandal? Check out ScarfingScarves's breakdown on the messy situation on her Youtube channel.

Even I have experienced racism on some level, in ways that honestly make no sense. At tea parties I've hosted, some critics have used the terms "ghetto" or "ratchet" to describe my work that are racially coded dog-whistles.

To elaborate, "dog-whistles" are terms that are geared towards a specific group of people, that when said, may mean nothing to one group, but says everything to another. When using the terms "ghetto" or "ratchet" to describe anything a Black person does, it is demeaning and often used to spread a negative stereotype on Black people.

Here's a helpful article from NPR on how "ghetto" has changed meaning over the years.

A submission from an incident during the BLC retreat.

Black Lolitas still have to deal with racism from people outside of the Lolita community though.

During last year's Black Lolita Community retreat, a group of Black Lolitas were accosted by two men while exploring the Harlem area. The men addressed the collective group as "negroes" because that's totally a great way to approach a group of strangers, -_-

Restaurant sign from El Paso, Texas in 1929.

We are in the Year of Our Lord 2019 (or in this incident, 2018), and people are still trying to justify using the term "negro" to describe Black people, as if that's ok. The reason why incidents like this are so frustrating is because while these events do happen to non-Black Lolitas, they don't happen in ways like this. Their negative interactions aren't rooted in subtle forms of racial microaggressions or oppressive language. 

But as I mentioned before, this behavior isn't new or surprising to Black Lolitas. In 2008, this same Lolita had another racist experience with a restaurant where she hosted an International Lolita Day event.

Testimony from a Black Lolita.

Why'd they bring out fried chicken? Well, because every Black person in the world loves fried chicken! At least, that's what the stereotype leads you to believe. Check out the history of the fried chicken stereotype here.

Colorism within the Lolita community is a bit more nuanced, but a perfect example is the skin lightening techniques of GLW to alter the skin color of their Black models. They were fine with hiring darker skinned models at some point, but their skin was too dark to be considered "doll like" so they lightened it. Erasure of dark skin for lighter skin tones is colorist because it supports the idea that light skin is somehow to superior to dark skin.

In general, lighter skinned Black people are more accepted than those with darker skin, and the same truth can be found in Lolita Fashion.

Black Lolitas are hardly ever represented in Lolita advertisements or promotions, especially by the major brands. But when we are finally included, they're almost always light skinned. 

Classical Puppets Promo

The act seems a tad contradictory too, because those same Black Lolitas that are ignored in global advertisements are often recruited to model in regional fashion shows. I'm specifically directing my comments towards the "major brands", because many Indie Lolita brands have featured Black Lolitas in their advertisements, though there could always be more.

The moment I saw this promo from Chinese Taobao brand Classical Puppets, I remember audibly gasping and saving the picture to my phone for inspiration. The reaction from other members in Lolita Updates was similar to my own, with lots of people pleasantly surprised to see a tan skinned person represented in a Lolita advertisement. The fact that we were all shocked by the action speaks volumes to how rare it is to see Black models being used for promotional projects.

4. Little Representation

H.Naoto models.

Many people will argue that the reason there are so few Black Lolitas in promotions is because they simply can't be found in the areas where these brands exist. I strongly disagree on that stance, and as a counter-point, will argue that it has more to do with the modeling/outreach opportunities afforded non-Black Lolitas when compared to Black Lolitas.

Nearly every Lolita has heard of the stories of famous Lolitas (i.e Venus Angelic and others) that were able to move to Japan and achieve their dreams of becoming a Lolita model, but rarely do we hear any stories of Black Lolitas even having the chance to do the same.

Even when guesting/attending events, the number of Black Lolitas (specifically Black-owned brands and Lolita models) that have been invited to share their insight and knowledge with the Lolita community is minuscule in comparison to the amount of non-Black Lolitas that receive those same offers.

Are there really so few Black people in the Lolita (and J-Fashion) community that there aren't any Lolitas "good enough" to represent us? Or is there inherent bias in a fashion that started in a homogenous country, in a world where pale skin is the global standard of beauty? Personally, I feel as though this issue in particular is a multifaceted problem, with several causes and affects.

Still, I don't think it's unfair to ask for brands, especially those that already accept Black models for local fashion shows, to *also* be ok to use us to market their clothing on a global scale. I don't believe that there are so few Black people in these countries that they can't find a single Black person to model their clothing.

5. Inequality

Clip from Scandal, I do not own!

ABC's Scandal was one of my favorite TV shows of all time. The entire show has so many notable quotes, but one scene in particular will forever be ingrained in my mind. After a particularly troubling incident, the main character, Olivia Pope, was lectured by her Father on her behavior. In the scene, her Father reminds her of something that Black children all over the world are told constantly: "You have to be TWICE as good to get HALF of what they have".

In the Lolita community, Black Lolitas are judged more harshly than our fairer skinned counterparts. Not just in looks, or size, or coord-ing abilities, but IN EVERYTHING. Earlier, I mentioned that a tea party I hosted was called "ghetto" and "ratchet" by critics online, and my first thought was how telling it is that those specific terms were used to describe my work instead of the millions of others out there. Let's also not forget that these terms were used against my work, when every Lolita out there has heard the stories of teas that have gone so far as to run out of food, tea, and even hot water. What could be more "ghetto" than a tea party where the hosts can't even provide hot water? 

Even while venting our frustrations in various places, Black Lolitas are told to "quit playing the race card", stop trying to make ourselves into victims, or straight up told not to discuss racial issues within the community. Then, when we make a group specifically for our demographic, we're accused of reverse racism (which doesn't exist. Read why here.), segregating ourselves, and secretly harboring hatred towards any Lolita that's not like us. No one says those things about the Lolita Gamers or the Lolita Moms Facebook groups, but they consistently say that about the Black Lolita Community. It's inequalities like these that prompted this post, and all of the other posts in this series.

If a non-Black Lolita can make a post on Rufflechat complaining about how rude people are to them, Black Lolitas should also be allowed to complain about how rude people are to us. If a fair skinned Lolita is featured in the Gothic Lolita Bible, a Black Lolita should also be given the opportunities to be featured as well. If there is a space for Lolita hair and make-up tutorials, people with dark skin and Afro-textured hair shouldn't have to beg to be included in those spaces because we're Lolitas too.

No Black Lolita wants fake concern or solidarity. Like every other space in our lives, we simply desire an equal playing field. We love the fashion as much as any other Lolita, and we spend just as much money as everyone else. Black Lolitas contribute to the fashion in so many ways, and in return, we're not only met with silence, but oftentimes oppression, dismissive attitudes, and outright racism.

Black Lolitas aren't asking to be placed above other Lolitas. We're not asking to be sheltered or protected more than any other demographic within the fashion. We're also not asking for "pity likes" or preferential treatment. All we want is to be treated like everyone else. 

If you made it to the end of this extremely lengthy post, congratulations and thank you. I hope that my words and research is something that the entire Lolita community can reflect on together. 

This is probably the most "negative" post I've ever written, and I can safely say that I wasn't prepared for the emotional impact this would have on me. I'm incredibly grateful to each and every person that's read, shared, and commented on these posts, and I promise the next one will be much more positive, :3

Until next time, my amazing readers!

Stay beautiful, stay true,

~J